Stress !

A lot of people say that the holidays are the most stressful time of the year . I beg to differ . Especially for high school students ! After the holidays is exam time . The holidays for me was jam-packed , but I still had a few moments of relaxation . We've only been back to school for a week since the break and I have already had three breakdowns . I had one today as well . I was and am under so much stress over the exam involved in this course , I am just about at the end of my leash . But what do I do ? There are still two to three weeks left , and I'm already at the end of my leash . I have no idea how I am going to plow through it . Not only am I piled with exam work , I also have two essays to write for Ryerson applications . I wrote them today . The first essay was a research based essay . That took me approximately four hours in total to write . The personal essay , which was the second one , took me about the same amount of time . For some odd reason , I found the personal essay to be much , much harder . Although the first one required actual research and a bibliography , the words seem to just come to me and the essay was there after a while . But for the personal one , the words just weren't coming and this drove me crazy . Which is when I had my breakdown . I initially planned to achieve a lot of homework today , but could not due to the time consuming essays . I wanted to complete the entire scrapbook , and have at least half of my Leadership Reflection finished and then have tomorrow to work on my portfolio . Now , I have to do the scrapbook and reflection tomorrow , forcing me to push back the date of the portfolio once again and that aggravates me . I wanted to have an early finish of my portfolio so I don't run into the major issues I did last year .

Not to mention , I have been on the computer since 11AM this morning . I have a huge headache . And to add to the stress , I can feel a distancing between myself and my family and I want to fix it , but don't even have time to do so . I'm in a lose-lose situation . I am stressed .

Summer Fierce

Post-Secondary !

I have yet to make the huge decision of what career path I want to take . Thankfully I found a way to buy myself sometime with it . So the decision has indeed come down to choosing between lawyering and acting . I found out that to go to law school , you need four years of an undergraduate course , which can be any subject . That means that you can choose any field to study for four years and if you're smart , you'll choose the subject that you score the highest grades in . Which for me is , who would have guessed , acting ! So I have four years to test out my acting skills and see if it lands me where I hope it can . If it doesn't , than I have still built a path that can lead me to my alternative goal of studying law . I applied to an acting-related course at Ryerson University and York University . Both stellar programs . And I applied to a law-related program at Ryerson , since we have three choices and because Law was one of my highest marks as well . If I don't make it into the acting program at Ryerson , but I do make it into the law-related one , I will go to that program and do acting outside of school . The acting program that I want to get into has very high standards and quite a hefty load of requirements before you are can be qualified to be considered to get into the course . It requires two essays . I have no idea how I'm going to find the time to write these while I have the exam to worry about . If I blow the exam , I blow my marks and the chances of getting into University . If I blow the essays , I blow my chances of getting into the University . Either way , I lose . So I really have to work hard and manage my time sufficiently . I have not a moment to waste . The competition for the University is fierce and so is the competition to win actor of the year - which I really , really need to win .

Summer Fierce

ScrapBooking !

For the leadership positions , I applied and was assigned to be the lead on the scrapbook . Being the lead on this project is huger than I thought it was , because I couldn't really start it until we came down to the last two months of the course , which was due to lack of photos . So all through-out my break , I've been scrapbooking ! It is A LOT of work , but once you get past the editing , cropping , printing , cutting and pasting and start on the designing , it is really quite enjoyable . You get to tackle your own creative perspective in different ways , which I rarely get a chance to do . We are supposed to have one hundred leadership hours by the end of this semester . When we hit mid-terms and the class was asked how many people had over fifty hours and most of the class already had over seventy-five and I was just slightly over fifty . . . I was scared . I thought ' Man ! I'm not going to pass this course ! There's no way I'm gonna get fifty-or-so more hours by the end of the semester , especially having to focus on the ' monster exam ' . Well to my surprise I now how . . . over a hundred hours ! I was so excited after I finally finished calculating all my hours . That gave me a chance to take a well-needed breath of relief and time to focus on writing my monologue . Thankfully I made the right decision to complete a good percentage of the scrapbook over the break , because there is NO WAY I could handle struggling with it - trying to juggle the scrapbook with the exam two weeks from now . It would be utter chaos .

Summer Fierce